Jon Heder and Billy Bob Thornton square off in School for Scoundrels, a comedy movie short on laughs and long on yawns. Writer/director Todd Phillips (Old School) loosely based his film on a British romp from the 1960s and as is the case with most remakes – even of the ‘loose’ variety – the original should have been left alone.
The Story
Heder stars as Roger, one of the wimpiest parking enforcement officers to ever patrol the city streets. No one respects the guy – not the violators he tickets, his co-workers, or even the kid who’s been assigned as Roger’s little bro in the Big Brothers program. Basically, he’s Rodney Dangerfield in a meter maid outfit. He’s so hopeless that he can’t even manage a conversation with his pretty neighbor, Amanda (a perky but forgettable Jacinda Barrett), without passing out from fright.
After letting Roger know his services in the Big Brother program are no longer needed (make that wanted), Ian (David Cross) passes on the phone number of a self-help guru who can make even the biggest loser into a real man. Roger’s desperate enough to try anything so he forks over the big bucks and becomes a pupil of the sadistic Dr P (Thornton). Dr P has a twisted approach to buffing up girlie men which involves a series of flashcards with instructions on how to lie to and manipulate women, as well as other bizarre techniques meant to boost the self-esteem of his students.
For some reason Roger takes to Dr P’s teaching methods like a duck to water. Roger masters the art of confrontation and even works up the nerve to start dating Amanda. Things are going just fine until he discovers there’s a huge target painted on his back. When Ian handed over Dr P’s number he withheld one crucial bit of information: the self-help guru always picks one person from each class to torpedo. By excelling in class, Roger earned the unfortunate distinction of being Dr P’s latest victim.
The Acting
Jon Heder needs to either totally break away from his Napoleon Dynamite character or completely submit to it. He plays Roger as a slightly less nerdy version of Napoleon and never commits to being the film’s romantic leading man. School for Scoundrels does nothing to show Heder’s able to play a non-Napoleon type of guy - even when his character grows a set and stands up to Thornton’s character’s cruel taunts. This role is simply too big for the fledgling actor.
Meanwhile Thornton plays it all way too safe. We’ve seen him do the bad seed routine before and there’s really nothing new here for the Oscar-winner to sink his teeth into. Plus, Thornton has the disadvantage of portraying a character whose motivations change with the wind.
Summing It Up
The basic problem is not a single character in School for Scoundrels is appealing or even likeable. Heder’s Roger is bland and silly and Thornton’s Dr P is such a jerk that choosing a side to cheer for is really a coin toss. School for Scoundrels relies too heavily on the audience buying into the film because of the teaming of Heder and Thornton, when in truth the pay-off on that pairing is just not there.
The set-up is fine but the writing’s disappointingly uneven. With the exception of the paintball scene, the jokes fall flat and the physical comedy can’t save the day. Teasing references to anal rape come out of the blue. And speaking of out of the blue, Ben Stiller appears in a disruptive sequence that feels both manipulative and fake.
The first trailers for the film didn’t even bother showing the love story angle, and the film itself would have been better off had the love triangle been scratched from the plot. The love story doesn’t work at all. Barrett and Heder have no chemistry and the combo of Barrett and Thornton is even worse.
A stronger actor in the loser role might have salvaged something from this formulaic comedy. Unfortunately, School for Scoundrels flunks out with audiences looking for a Phillips film as funny as the writer/director's Old School.
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